How to Fail your Driving Test
by Dxllhouse
Summary: It's Bloom's first time at driving on the road, but she barely manages to scrape past theory. So if she's that bad at pen and paper, behind the wheel must be dangerous torture. Not just for her, but for her un-fortunate driving instructor.


**The one chapter story on how Bloom copes with her driving test. It's different, interesting, funny and I hope you enjoy it.**

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**Bloom POV**

"Bloom Cortez?"

"Yes sir?" I asked walking up to a guy (probably in his fifties) holding a clipboard and pen.

"If you could please come with me, it is time for you to take the test."

"Oh. Yes sir." I replied following him to the awaiting vehicle outside.

It was my official, first time driving test today and I was a mix of excitement and nerves. I had barely managed to scrape past the theory so I wasn't sure what being on the road would be like if I was that bad at pen and paper.

I got into the driver's side, whilst he got into the passenger seat. I put on my seatbelt then he handed me a piece of paper and pen. _Safety Rules and Regulations_

"But, I thought-"

"You have to fill in the safety rules and regulations Miss Cortez. It's the law." He told me, sternly.

"Yes sir." I sighed and filled it in. I just wanted to get on the road and have it all done and over with!

"Here." I handed him back the paper. He nodded as he slowly read over it.

"OK. Now that that's all sorted, we can start."

What he really meant, was that before we start, we have to spend fifteen minutes going over all the instruments in the car, what they are used for and when they need to be used. And even after all that he still wasn't ready. Hello! Who's the one driving here?

"Just before we go, how did you do on your theory?" He checked.

"Uh, well, I just got by." I smiled sheepishly.

"Just got by?"

"By…one mark."

He let out a heavy sigh. "Oh god help us all!" He mumbled.

Now I was really impatient. "Can I start then?"

"Yes."

I put the keys in the ignition and started up the engine. Then I pulled out the parking space and got up to the junction.

"Indicator."

"Oh yeah! Oops!" I quickly flicked it up to turn right, then pulled out of the junction and on the main road.

The plan was to follow the road in a sort circle that lead back to where we started.

"Lower gear now and don't forget to brake before putting the clutch on." Sir reminded me.

I dropped into lower gear but then I started to panic a bit because this was a four way busy junction.

"Brake! Brake!" He yelled sitting rigid in his seat. I did, very quickly and then put on the clutch as we waited for the light to change.

"Just remember to brake when at junctions! It's pretty important!" I nodded.

The light then changed to green and I turned to go left.

"We're missing the indicator again here!"

"Uh-huh." I flicked it down to turn left then made it and carried on down the road.

"Ah. Slow gear changes. When it makes that grinding sound, you need to change gear." He scribbled a few notes down onto the clipboard.

Slow gear changes? I'll show you I'm not slow!

I pressed down harder on the accelerator and changed the gears as I had been told.

"Jesus Christ! Slow down! You're doing seventy on a fifty miles an hour road!"

"You said I was slow!" I responded, annoyed.

"On the gear changes, yes!" He replied angrily. "But your speed was fine!"

We came up to another point, this time it was a round-a-bout.

"Lower gear. Brake. Clutch." I mumbled to myself as the car neared the junction.

"OK. You did a better job that time, but a bit quicker next time."

_Shut up, I'm driving!_

We got up to the end of the road and I looked right quick to see if there were any cars coming. Unfortunately, there was, but I never noticed. The driving instructor did though.

"Brake! Brake! You're gonna smash into him! No, turn! Follow the roa- NO! You missed the turning! You've got to go all the way round now. Ah! Are you blind? You almost smashed into that car! No, you're turning too hard. You're heading into the round-a-bout now. Veer left. GO LEFT! No! Avoid the- AH! Massive Tesco lorry! Don't hit it…I said _don't _hit it! Oh thank god, there's the turning. Left, turn left!"

I very sharply made the turning. Thankfully I did, otherwise this guy would have died from a panic attack. He was totally freaking out._ If_ he had hair, he would have pulled all of it out by now.

"You do realise…we were almost ROAD KILL!?" he yelled in my face.

"He he. Well…at least we made it out…alive." I gulped.

"Right, here's your new goal, don't get killed."

"Better said than done." I mumbled to myself.

"What?" He asked, very sharply turning his head to look at me.

"Nothing!" I lied. If he heard me, he would have much rather strangled me to death, than have me stay at the wheel and murder us both. Hmmm, which is more likely?

The next point to tackle was a mini round-a-bout. Easy, right? Wrong!

"The point of a round-a-bout." He breathed, trying to stay as calm as possible or explode. "Is to go a_round _it. Not drive straight over it, as you just perfectly demonstrated!"

OK, so I just drove straight over that mini, little round-a-bout and he's making it sound like I've just started World War III. Oh come on! I didn't just throw a nuclear bomb over America. I just drove over a diddy little round-a-bout. Oh god, I've broken the law now haven't I? Get the police to hand-cuff me!

"WHAT?! I just- I didn't- It's not like a cow was standing there and I ran over it!"

"No but someone could have been turning and smashed right into you." He retorted.

"Yeah, but it's not like I drove onto the public path and ran over a human. What about the ant I squished back there huh? An innocent ant, and I squished it. _Splat!_ What, you're not going to scold me for that now are ya?"

"Keep your whole concentration on the road before you _do _hit someone! And an ant? It's better than hitting a pigeon."

Eh, he's got a point.

Fifteen minutes later, I had successfully managed to run over a pedestrians' foot, smash into the back of the car in front, go through a red light, almost kill us both (again) and scar my driving instructor for life.

Then, after I had proudly bashed the back of this car trying to reverse into the parking space we were in originally before starting, I sat and waited for the guy to gather his notes and give me a rough idea on whether I had passed.

"So" I turned to him and his notes. "How'd I do?"

"After much consideration…let's just get to the point, you failed. By a lot!"

"WHAT?!" I screamed at him. I thought I did pretty well.

"Well, you almost killed us ten times as well as other drivers and pedestrians."

I was outraged. "Fuck you!" I spat, before getting out the car, slamming the door shut in his face and leaving him to sit and think about the mistake he'd made.

"Bloom!" Someone called from behind me. It was Sky.

"Hi." I smiled weakly at him. Really couldn't be bothered at the minute.

He came up and planted a kiss on my lips, before stepping back to let me explain how it went. I hadn't even made it out of the parking lot where I just crashed my vehicle.

"So…" He urged.

"So it went horribly wrong. Sky, I failed!" I wailed. He pulled me close to his chest for reassurance.

"Failed? How?"

"Well it didn't help, the driving instructor was a prick." Sky released me from his arms so I could talk to him without being muffled out. "And, so I might have almost crashed more than once and possibly killed innocent people but…I squished an ant Sky, an ant. He didn't even care!"

Suddenly, another learner's vehicle came speeding into the parking lot and smashed head on with the car I'd only just done my test in.

"Holy crap! What just happened?!"

"I dunno Bloom, but we better get over there to check they're alright!"

Me and Sky ran over to the vehicle, then the learner got out. I only recognised her immediately.

"Stella!?"

Oh yeah, forgot to mention. Stella also had her driver's test today, but at a later time than me. She must have got on just as bad…or worse judging by the carnage she just caused.

"Oh hey Bloom! How'd it go?"

She just crashed her car and she's acting as if nothing happened at all!

"Failed. I'm guessing you have to?"

"Yep! Can see why too. Crashed this thing twice…setting off the airbags both times. Uhhh, almost ran over three people, drove through a red light, bashed into the car in front shoving him into the flow of traffic, almost drove straight into Tesco express, murdered a pigeon and…oh! Almost gave my instructor a heart attack. Why'd you fail?"

"Pretty much the same as you. Just not as drastic." I shrugged.

"Brandon's gonna have a great time when you drive then." Sky commented.

"Yeah, well, he's picking me up. First thing he'll see is this and then he'll ask 'What happened here?' Then he'll look at me and that's all the answer he needs." Stella explained.

And just on time, Brandon turned up. Coincidence or what?

"What the bloody hell happened here?" He asked completely gobsmacked.

Stella waved in his direction, and he went over to her and placed his left arm round her waist.

"Hi sweetie. This, errr, I kinda caused this. Yeah, I failed." Stella admitted.

Brandon looked at her and smirked. "You failed? I knew you would! That's why I brought the car."

That's another thing I forgot to mention. Sky and Brandon passed there driving test, like, ages ago. Good job too! Cause me and Stella, we're crap at this.

"Thankfully you did. Because if I drove, we'd both end up in A&amp;E." Stella grimaced at the thought.

"I wouldn't let you touch the steering wheel, let alone drive the car after what you just caused." We all laughed.

"Come on then." Brandon said, slowly starting to walk off with Stella. "Let's go before the police arrive."

"No! I'm too pretty to go to jail!" Stella panicked. We all laughed at that as well.

Brandon kissed her on the forehead. "I'm joking Stella. No police are going to come!"

"A big pay bill might." Sky nudged me in the ribs and I shifted uncomfortably. Yeah, we probably cost them thousands of pounds in damage.

Stella and Brandon left and walked back to his car whilst me and Sky started walking back.

I knew that I had to retake the test again at some point, but I definitely wasn't coming back here. My driving test fail.

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**Did you enjoy it? Like I said, it's different to usual ones.**

**Want me to do more? Ask. Always open.**

**Stella Winx 21-Just Living the magic**


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